The Truth About Successful Women in Business

Impostor syndrome even after 20 years in the market. What I witnessed at a women's innovation summit with 350 successful business women.

Two weeks ago, I attended one of the most relevant summits: Mulheres que Inovam (Women who innovate) in São Paulo, Brazil. 350 women gathered, and I was highly impressed by the audience. Most women there were entrepreneurs, women in business like myself. The speakers were selected and their sessions curated with such intent that the whole summit flowed seamlessly. It was beautifully orchestrated.

Successful women whose trajectories were everything but easy.

Women who made it as entrepreneurs, as regional and even global leaders. Women who still felt they were not good enough. The impostor syndrome resonating as loud as always.

Why?

White women, black women, older women, younger women. A common denominator: Am I good enough? Is my story worth telling? Am I experienced enough? Am I tough enough?

Don't get me wrong, I struggle with this too. My husband serves as my mirror, reminding me: 'You are enough. You've done enough. You have enough.' Not every woman has someone regularly speaking that truth into her life.

The constant need of proving ourselves

When is the last time you confidently said: "I haven't done this before but I know I'll nail it"? Truth is, very few of us - women- think like that. If you are one of them, you're already in a great starting position.

Last week at one of my bi-weekly meetings with a portfolio company, same story. The founder was feeling the pressure of the world for an event she's run successfully for years. When I reminded her of her track record, she insisted: 'But this time there's more weight, more expectations.'

It's like this unspoken pressure we put on ourselves to deliver and to be accepted as enough.

And if you're a Type A personality like many of us entrepreneurs? That pressure is on steroids.

Type A personalities - we're our own worst critics

If you're a Type A personality (driven, competitive, achievement-oriented, constantly striving for perfection), you know this pattern intimately: You accomplish something difficult, check it off your mental list, and immediately move to the next challenge. No pause. No celebration. Just forward motion.

We're wired to see the gap between where we are and where we want to be - not to appreciate how far we've climbed.

We are aggressive go-getters, AND this is exactly why we need to remind ourselves that we just did a very difficult thing! But recognizing the achievement is only half the battle. Here's where we really trip ourselves up:

"When the legend becomes fact, print the legend"  From "The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance" (1962 film)

Here's the story behind this phrase:

There's this old Western film, "The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance," that perfectly captures what we do to ourselves as women.

The plot goes like this: Senator Ransom Stoddard (James Stewart) built his entire political career on one reputation - he was "the man who shot Liberty Valance," a notorious outlaw who terrorized their frontier town. Hero status. Legend status. Career-making status.

Except he didn't actually shoot Liberty Valance.

Tom Doniphon (John Wayne) did it from the shadows and let Stoddard take all the credit. Years later, when a newspaper reporter discovers the truth, the editor refuses to publish it. He burns the notes and delivers one of cinema's most famous lines:

"This is the West, sir. When the legend becomes fact, print the legend."

Here's why this matters to us: We do the exact opposite.

When we accomplish something difficult, we immediately downplay it. We tell a different story - one where we minimize our role, credit luck or timing, or highlight everyone else's contribution except our own.

We take the legend of what we actually did and replace it with a lesser version. We un-legend ourselves.

So TELL other people about that difficult thing you did:

→ TELL your team, so they get inspired.

→ TELL Your female peers, so they know it's possible.

→ TELL men too (because they wouldn't hesitate to tell it either, so why not?).

At the summit, I watched a woman who'd built empires apologize for "rambling" after giving the most articulate, valuable advice I'd heard all day. Another founder who'd revolutionized her industry was invited to contribute to an inspirational book for women entrepreneurs. Her response to the editor? 'I'm not sure I have something interesting to share.'

Another example: a senior executive from a Fortune 10 company shared the story when she was offered the promotion she never even dreamt of and countered her boss with: "I think there are other people better prepared than me for that position". 🤦‍♀ Meanwhile, studies show that men apply for jobs when they meet 60% of qualifications. Women? We wait until we hit 100%. And even then, we wonder if we're qualified enough.

No judgment here—I struggle with this too. The difference? I've learned that impostor syndrome is a condition that visits as often as you allow it to. 

The lie we keep believing

"The thief has come to steal, kill and destroy but I have come to give you life to the full." — John 10:10, The Bible

Here's the thing that hit me hardest at that summit: We're not suffering from lack of achievement. We're suffering from lack of acknowledgment - specifically, our own.

"The thief has come to steal, kill and destroy and it operates through lies. Lies that we took as our own and keep repeating.

The "thief" isn't just external circumstances or difficult clients or market conditions. Sometimes the thief is that voice in our heads telling us we're not enough, we haven't done enough, we need to prove ourselves one more time.

That voice is lying.

Remember that founder I mentioned? Over the last month, she'd been spiraling into anxiety. 'I want the event to go perfect,' she kept saying. More scrutiny. Higher stakes. What if she messed up?

I pulled up her track record. She'd run this exact event successfully for 10 years. Ten times. Flawlessly.

But that doesn't matter when impostor syndrome kicks in, does it? Each new challenge feels like starting from zero, like you have to prove yourself all over again.

What actually changes the pattern

At the summit, one speaker said something that stopped me cold: "We wait for permission to claim our expertise. Men just claim it."

She was right. How many times have you downplayed your achievement with "I was just lucky" or "The timing was right" or "My team did most of the work"?

Now imagine a man in your position. Would he minimize it? Or would he own it, tell everyone, and probably get a promotion or raise off the back of it?

I'm not saying become arrogant. I'm saying: Stop being the only one who doesn't know how good you are.

Here's what I want you to do this week:

Seriously, actually do this. Don't just nod and move on.

1. Write down 3 difficult things you've accomplished this year.

Not "I managed to keep the business running", I'm talking about actual achievements. New clients. Revenue growth. Problems solved. Systems built. People developed.

2. Tell someone about them.

Your team. A peer. A mentor. Your partner. Say them out loud without minimizing or qualifying. Just state the facts.

3. Before your next challenge, remind yourself:

"I've done hard things before. I'll figure this one out too."

That's it. Three steps. But if you're like most women I know (including myself), step 2 will make you want to crawl out of your skin. Do it anyway.

The real story of the summit

You know what actually happened at Mulheres que Inovam? Three hundred and fifty incredibly accomplished women walked into that room feeling like impostors. And by the end, when we'd all been vulnerable enough to admit it, we realized: If all these brilliant, successful, powerful women struggle with this, maybe it's not about us being insufficient. Maybe it's about us finally recognizing that the standard we're holding ourselves to is impossible - and unnecessary.

Your male competitors aren't waiting until they're 100% qualified. They're not apologizing for their expertise. They're not wondering if their story is worth telling.

So why are you?

The women at that summit? They're changing industries, building empires, creating jobs, solving problems. And they're doing it while constantly questioning whether they're good enough.

Imagine what they (what you) could do if you actually believed what everyone else already knows: You're more than enough. You've done more than enough. And the life you're meant to live? It's not supposed to feel like constantly proving yourself.

It's supposed to feel full.

This week, practice taking up space. 

Not apologizing. Not minimizing. Just existing in your expertise without justification.

Because somewhere, there's a woman watching you, wondering if she's good enough to try. And your example - claiming your expertise, owning your achievements - might be exactly what gives her permission to step forward.

P.S. If reading this made you uncomfortable, good. Growth lives in discomfort. Hit reply and tell me: What's one achievement you've been downplaying that actually deserves to be celebrated? I want to hear it. No qualifying. No "but it wasn't that big." Just the win.

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